On Canada Day, two of this nation’s most famous musicians celebrated by getting married. Singer Avril Lavigne and Nickelback frontman Chad Kroeger tied the knot at a small ceremony in the south of France. Here are some of the highlights from the big day, as we imagine it.
• The couple overpronounced their own vows.
• The wedding band? Theory of a Wedman.
• Middle finger wedding rings.
• Rockstar Energy toasts.
• More speeches mentioning the word “rock” than a
• The wedding theme was “With Arms Wide Open.” Oh
wait, that’s Creed. Nevermind.
• The officiant opened with, “He was a groom, she was a
bride. Can I make it any more obvious?” to tepid laughter.
• Vows co-written by the Matrix.
• The cake was inedible due to the decision to put actual
metal studs on it.
• At the cake cutting, Chad said, “You look so much cuter
with frosting in your mouth,” to tepid laughter.
• The photographer was heard to remark, “What the hell
is on Joey’s head?”
• Tuxedo provided by Edward Hardleston, the classy
• These were the cake toppers:
(Siu Ding/Flickr; eBay)
on Jul 02, 2013