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blog post Rocking and Friending with Anvil

posted by Lisa Christiansen on Apr 03, 2009

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Coming Up: Sasha Gervasi, director of Anvil! The Story of Anvil @ 3:30 PT / 6:30 ET

Have you ever had a dream, one of those goals that overtakes your entire life and guides your actions and decisions? Me neither, but Steve "Lips" Kudlow and Robb Reiner sure did (do). At 14, the two vowed to rock forever, and that's just what they've done with their band Anvil.

I'm not exactly sure if a documentary about their struggles to keep playing over 30 years was what they planned, but in the end Anvil! The Story of Anvil is giving the band a second shot at the fame they missed back in the 80s when their metal sound was just taking off.

The film opens today in Vancouver and Toronto, and in more cities on April 10, after playing film festivals and making the band sought-after again. And it's all thanks to a fan the band met back in the day in London, England.

I don't want to steal any of the story from filmmaker Sasha Gervasi, who joins me for an interview on today's show. He fills me in on how he first met the band, why he decided to make the film and how despite being a film about a seen-better-days metal band, this is really a story about friendship.

Along with enduring bonds and my chat with Sasha, it's also Friday - a day when people think about getting together with friends. Seems like a good time to take a close look at these incredibly complex relationships.

What makes a good friend?

What is the secret to having a relationship last so long, a friend or a band?

Could you imagine having the same close friend for over 30 years?

What would make you dump a friend?

Do men and women do friendships differently?

Here's the interview with Sacha:

Let me know your thoughts on the blog, and just so you know - Facebook Friends don't count!

posted by Lisa Christiansen on Apr 03, 2009

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#1 posted by
mcfflyer
on Apr 03, 2009

What a GREAT story and interview!!

Lee Hower
Sacramento

#2 posted by
TheRadioHead
on Apr 03, 2009

I'd like to address all your questions, but that would be more along the lines of a therapy session!

I have two friendships over 30 years long, one a guy, one a girl.

Friendships become effortless to maintain after that length of time, you never have to explain anything anymore, they just get it.

You know their likes, their family member's quirky traits, they know your whole history, and you can say anything to them. You go through a lot of crap together in that length of time, I could not imagine what could possibly break up these friendships at this point.

However, I do think about what it would be like to have a long time friend die, something I had to consider when one of them had a cancer scare.

I could not even contemplate my life without her.

#3 posted by
mcfflyer
on Apr 03, 2009

Lisa, when I saw today’s subject and questions, I immediately started writing. But what you ask fosters such extensive answers, I realized that as long-winded as I normally am on the blog, I’d be way over the top on this, but what great, thought provoking questions.

I have a best friend for 38 years, my old college-era friend, Tom Gibson, and each year we highlight our year by going off camping in our Northern California mountains. (And NO, it’s not Brokeback Mountain.) Just two old friends getting together to camp, talk, fish, watch trains, meet up with old friends, and just escape our normal lives in Sacramento and San Diego. It’s a highlight of my year, and a treasured part of my own children’s summers, as they liked going camping as much. We’ve been doing this now for the last 19 years. And I can't tell you how important it was to have him as my sounding board as I was going through the Divorce From Hell.

As for bands, there probably are only two reasons to stay together a long time, either being family or being friends. That’s one of the reasons why I like Sloan so much – after 20 years they are still friends. That alone is a sign of success.

Lee Hower

#4 posted by
Lisa Christiansen
on Apr 03, 2009

I've never been accused of setting the bar high for thinking...thanks!

#5 posted by
AlexOfAnders
on Apr 03, 2009

Wow, deep questions on here today.
Personally, I don't think I've really had a friendship last more than 7 years. It seemed like my year of school children (small city, not that many different schools) didn't have a lot of people that clicked that well. I don't know about other people but when I finished high school and left for University, I never looked back.

So far I have some good friends from University and I think I'll always be friends with my buddy in Toronto. It hasn't been the same around here since he moved back.

I haven't figured out what the secret to having a super long lasting connection with someone. I think a good friend is just someone who accepts who you are for who you are. They don't ask you to be more or less than that and that's all you ask of them. I've always felt though, that you can tell when you have a really good friend and connection with someone when you can always pick up things as if you had just seen them yesterday, even if you haven't talked in years.

To dump a friend, for me that takes a lot of grating personality. It's more like when someone considers you their friend but they leave you feeling used and abused. Sometimes this is more discrete than you might think but sometimes a relationship is just toxic for you and the only way out is a clean break. Luckily, this is usually a very rare occurrence!

#6 posted by
CDNz1
on Apr 03, 2009

I just realized that I have three friends that have been there for more than 25 years. Tim, Bob & I were in a Psych class (imagine that) together and Margaret is an ex-girlfriend. We have moved away and returned to the Detroit area, been through divorces and survived bad times as well as good times. The common thread here? Beer, wicked sick humour and a fanatical devotion to the Pope. Okay, I'm kidding about the Pope.

Great interview with Sasha, there's a fan! Maybe in 20 years I'll do a "Where Are My R3 Mates Now?"

#7 posted by
CDNz1
on Apr 03, 2009

I think today is Windbag-Posts-Are-Okay Friday...

#8 posted by
AlexOfAnders
on Apr 03, 2009

Oh, I just thought maybe the reason I haven't had very long friendships is that I'm just not old enough. Only left high school about 7 years ago...

Lisa, I find you often ask somewhat deep questions or maybe it's just how we take them

#9 posted by
Lisa Christiansen
on Apr 03, 2009

I do seem to ask rather thoughtful questions. Odd because I'm a rather shallow person in real life...hello perezhilton 6x a day!

#10 posted by
Lisa Christiansen
on Apr 03, 2009

for the Grey's head's up, but there goes my Friday night plans. I might have to call a friend or something!

#11 posted by
TheRadioHead
on Apr 03, 2009

"a relationship is just toxic "

Ya, we have a group of 4 friends, and one of us was just poisoning the whole pool. The 3 of us had to decide to dump her, but it was one of the hardest subjects to even broach, let alone make the decision to do it.

But, we did, and it was just the right thing to do.

#12 posted by
AlexOfAnders
on Apr 03, 2009

Yeah, it's really hard to do and especially in a group, even bring up. I found the same thing though, as soon as it's done you'll know that it was the right thing to do. One of the only times I dumped someone like that was when they went on vacation and I figured out why things had been so awesome recently once they got back ><

#13 posted by
TheRadioHead
on Apr 03, 2009

They played a little show here for 60 last week. And I, thanks to a wonderful friend with connections, was front and center.

The lighting was fantastic, and I got 100 excellent pictures.

Tony Deker is a charming man.

#14 posted by
katrinaskye
on Apr 03, 2009

I Had the same best friend for over 10 years and I thought she was just shy. Four months ago I relized she was just too lazy to talk.
We are no longer friends.....

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