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blog post Going Back à "Home" = Going Crazy

posted by Antoine Bédard on Aug 23, 2008

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Coming up today, guest host Antoine Bédard aka Montag, 6PM ET / 3 PT on CBC Radio 3's web radio:

You know in those geeky board games when you get the card that says "Pass your turn and go home directly", it's rarely a good thing.

It feels like you have to start the game all over again and because of that, you feel like you might never be the winner. I feel like I picked that card right now... but in real life (to all the board game geeks out there, you know what how I'm feeling). Basically, I'm moving back home to Montréal, after living in Vancouver for 3 years. The only difference with that game card, is that I made the choice to move back.

In the three years I've been in Vancouver, all of my friends (and especially my boyfriend!) have heard me complain about Vancouver for way too long and how much I've been missing Montreal and now that the big move is coming, I'm losing it! I guess that listening to a lot of France Gall (my mom's favorite singer when she was a teen) or to Les Ritas Mistouko (the first French band I was really into in highschool) has helped bringing back some great memories and has given me some energy to pack more boxes... But it hasn't taken away all the stress - at all!

Going back what you call "home" is supposed to be feeling great, I guess. I'd be happy to hear your stories on that. If you ever moved back to your hometown after a long stay abroad or elsewhere in the country, let me know how you felt! Maybe reading your comments will me feel better.

I'm also pretty amazed when I write down some of the obvious changes I'll have to get used to. Are they all for the best? Well you can't always get the best of both worlds. Basically, moving from Vancouver to Montreal means going:

... from rain to snow.
... from great sushi to great poutine.
... from "I'd like an Americano Misto with a hint of cinnamon on top" to "un allongé s'il vous plaît".
... from lots of room in the Skytrain to getting squeezed in the métro.
... from "hmm sorry I won't come to the party. I think I'm going to stay home and watch a movie tonight" to "I walked out of the bar at 4 o'clock this morning and I swear it must have been minus 75 degrees"
... from the wide ocean and beautiful mountains to a river you never really see.
... and of course from more rain to even more snow...

But really what I'm realizing is that our country is simply too big. I know I'm not the first one to point that out. So end on a good note, to everyone I know in Vancouver I'd like to say "I hope to see you again soon!" and to all my friends in Montréal I say: "Je reviens! Enfin!"

Thanks to CBC for letting me write this post. That was really therapeutic. You can also read my own blog HERE.

Photo by Patrick Kennedy

posted by Antoine Bédard on Aug 23, 2008

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#1 posted by
Silvorgold
on Aug 23, 2008

Salut!
Great to see a Quebecois hosting on CBC3

#2 posted by
Silvorgold
on Aug 23, 2008

I never realized that Amy Millan sung in your song Safe in Sound. I saw Stars et Feist a Quebec et le concert was amazing, Stars joined Feist at the end

#3 posted by
Ruiva
on Aug 23, 2008

N'oublie pas Antoine...

- From closing early to get what you what when you want it (the dep, cheap alcohol, Segal groceries, more festivals than you can name)
- from the strangers' handshake to the friendly bisous
- From great sushi to smoked meat and Portuguese franga
- from regular ol' cussing to the province of the most expressive swear words
- from warm days/cold nights to warm days/warm nights
- from a great music scene to a great music scene

Enjoy! Profitez-en!

#4 posted by
starboo44
on Aug 23, 2008

loseerloserloserloserloserloserloserloser you are a lossssssssssser cause this is boreding

#5 posted by
rdickie
on Aug 24, 2008

I spent 21 of my 24 years on this planet earth in vancouver. I had spent the summer in ottawa and i've been to 'la belle province' many times to visit relatives. I just arrived 'home' yesterday and it feels a little strange.. not quite like the "home" feeling i was hoping for even though everything is very familiar. All i can say is that i will miss the strong french canadian culture but will welcome the international stew that is vancouver.

#6 posted by
Chris Alscher
on Aug 25, 2008

the first time I heard about you, a Montrealer moving to Vancouver, I was thinking to myself that it was only a matter of time that you would give your head a shake. I do not understand Vancouver's allergies to art, young people, music, and shows above 90 decibals. Safe travels back to a great city. Saw you play at Pat's Pub for Music Waste a while ago. Loved your stuff and your Vibraphone. I think it was a vibraphone.

#7 posted by
BigRockFan
on Aug 26, 2008

There’s no going back Antoine, only going forward. Montreal isn’t the city you left 3 years ago, and you’re not the same person you were 3 year ago. You’re going forward to a new experience with some familiar elements, like great smoked meat sandwiches and poutine, amongst other things.

I’m not sure I’m following what you mean when you say Canada is too big, but I’d say that as individuals we need to think even bigger than Canada. More and more we’re becoming a global community now, and I think we need to start thinking of more people as part of our extended community, not fewer. I think when you go home you always meet up with old friends and others who never left home, and perhaps because of their fear of the unknown they often act as though they wish you hadn't changed, and as though they’d like to build a wall around their small community and shut the world out. But that attitude is neither realistic nor healthy, imo. I think we need to spread our arms wider and embrace more people, and when you go back to Montreal I think you should spread your arms wider embrace your community in a new ways that include your experiences in BC. Some people probably won’t like that and will want you to be exactly who you were when you left, and others will welcome the new perspectives that you bring, but that’s all part of moving forward, imo.

I also think it would be great if you could keep doing guest hosting on Radio 3. You’d be a great person to help bring the Radio 3 audience up to speed on what’s happening in the Montreal scenes, both French and English.

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